All posts in the Creatures category

Kat diary; It’s (going to be) A GIRL!!

Published August 19, 2016 by hairballexpress

Oh my Flippin FLEAS!🙀

Yesterday all the humans were wound up tighter than a cheap clock…and guess WHY?

Well, it all started when the human woke up at 5:30 am to watch the Creature when its parents went to work. 

At 7:3o she noticed the Creature hadn’t arrived yet, so she decided to just go to her house instead. 

Just as she got there, she saw the Creature and her Mom and they were getting ready to leave to go to the doctor fur the ultrasound that was going to let the Creature’s Mom and Dad know how the baby is doing-

And they came back with all these pictures of the littlest tiniest Creature! 

  • And, it’s A GIRL!!!!!!!!! 

The Creature is going to have a baby sister! *frantically digging tunnel to Japan*

Here are some of the close up ultrasound pictures (at 18 weeks):

They are all so excited – and even Serafina knows somethings up -(wait til I tell her what all this means)! 

To them it’s all exciting – but to Serafina and I – (and every other Kat in the neighborhood)- it’s DOUBLE TROUBLE! 🙀


                   *darts under bed*


Caturday Not – So – Crazy 

Published July 23, 2016 by hairballexpress

Greetings humans, fleabags and fuzzballs! 😺  ☕️

Just checking in with you all to let you know I haven’t deserted you. We kats don’t do that nonsense.

The human is still running around like a flippin tornado (helping her neighbor in the Care Center, and caring fur the neighbor’s Kat, and the pink tornado everyday).

This is in addition to her usual working fur her Mary Kay business, and helping out the Creature’s (purregnant) Mom and Dad and taking care of herself and human #2, the house, and cute little ME. (The most important of all). 

*lifts nose in the air / swishes tail *

I’ve been working hard to keep the human cheered up (it’s hard being surrounded by grief all day), and reminding her to take time fur her workouts and to just relax with me a little. 

She’s also been sneaking in opportunities to play with me wherever she can find them. 

Like yesterday when she was folding her laundry – I invited her to throw a dish towel over me and I even walked around wearing it fur as long as it would stay on, just because it felt good to see her laugh! See – check it out! 😸

 She gets such a kick out of that!😸

Tori is doing much better since the Mobile Vet cane and took care of her right in the neighbor’s home – that was such a relief fur the human and her furiend who knew she needed care, but had no way to get her to the vet. Tori didn’t appureciate it until later, though! 😹 

Here are some pictures the human took of the mobile vet visit – she was really impurressed at how thorough and gentle they were with Tori – she would really recommend them to anyone who has a hard time taking their kitty to the vet! 

Contact Eugene Mobile Veterinary Service – if you’re in Oregon! You won’t be sorry!

That was a few days ago – this is Tori this morning….

There’s a lot more to tell you, but it’s time now for my play session – later, dudes! 😸


Published July 21, 2016 by hairballexpress

I’m sorry – I will not be posting today aside from this post.

The human had a very upsetting call today from the neighbor who is in rehab (and whose Kat she has been caring fur since July 2).

The neighbor’s 4 year old grandson died today during the last of countless heart surgeries. 

Please purray fur them all and fur the human as she tries to comfort and help them.

They have already been through too much.

Shrimp’s Kat diary: She’s flipped!

Published July 18, 2016 by hairballexpress

Sunday, July 17th (or something).

Dang, I’m so flippin CUTE!

 *Adjusts mirror *

Well, thanks to that idiot human being too busy to flippin BREATHE, she’s made me miss TWO FLIPPIN POSTS!! 😾

I mean, dude. I have to find a way to stop this flippin nonsense – how will my poor readers survive without their daily dose of Shrimp?🙀

I thought fur sure the human had lost it this morning – first, she slept way later than normal – and then when she woke up she was all – HAPPY! 

She broke her usual routine, which had me scratching my cute little head- in fact, she didn’t even go for her coffee fur awhile (bad news)!!

But then, she did something that made me wonder if she’s been dipping in my nip – 

I never thought I’d see her playing with dolls when the Creature isn’t around – but I guess all this stress had finally cracked her!

She put “Lavender”-(the Creature’s “baby sister”), on a chair on the front porch this morning, with an apple, and a cup of Almonds (speaking of NUTS)… 

And soon after that, she put the dolls’ hair up in a ponytail and put her Her Mary Kay nail polish and a mini lipgloss next to the doll and positioned her to look like she was playing with it -(good thing she didn’t see me taking pictures)!!😹 

I was really starting to get nervous –

But then, I looked and saw this text from the Creature’s Mom that she had sent the human this morning, and things started  to make sense (even fur her)!

So, The human had done all that so she could take pictures fur the Creature to let the Creature know she was watching her “little sister!” 😹 

Whew! What a relief! 😸

Then, Gloria’s Mom came – (the human had Gloria’s house key and knew she was coming so she stayed home to be available fur her)- and next thing she knew the pink tornado came FLYING in the house to “pick up her sister!”😹 

Then she purrceeded to put “Lavender’s” jacket on her and get a behavior report!!

MWAHAHAHA!! Oh my fleas!!!!😹 

I can’t WAIT to see what tomorrow will bring!!!! 

Meanwhile, I have to get my beauty rest! 

Oh yeah,…. This is nice….

But this is even better! 🐬

Kat 9 News Special Report 

Published May 7, 2016 by hairballexpress

Greetings humans, fleabags and fuzzballs. 

This is Shrimp coming to you today with an urgent Special Report fur all you kats and your pet humans.

🔺 Kats too late to start human TNR PURROGRAM

Well, I’m afraid a brilliant Kat plan (devised by myself, Serafina and the rest of the kats in our neighborhood)- has UnFURtunately been thwarted. 

Kats everywhere have been noticing with  increasing alarm, that creatures are popping up at alarming rates in every neighborhood, and it’s been suggested that purrhaps it was time to give the humans a taste of their own medicine.

That’s when Serafina and I spoke to all our furiends and decided to institute the Human TNR PURROGRAM, (trap / nueter / return). 

Although it is a purrfect solution, there are a few things to work out. Fur example, how the flea does a kat go about trapping their human and getting them to the vet?

This is what we and the other neighborhood kats were addressing when the unthinkable happened –

Yep. Serafina shared some selfies she took of the moment she found out –

*Sighs deeply* 

Poor Serafina! 🙀 And of course, the Creature and the whole bunch of humans are flippin thrilled.



This has been Shrimp reporting fur Kat 9 News. Good grief.

Kat diary: Creature Feature

Published April 29, 2016 by hairballexpress

Greetings humans!😺 ☕️ 

Spying on the humans around here has become a full time job fur me and Serafina – especially where the Creature and her minions are concerned!

Take fur example yesterday…. I stalked on over to the Creature’s house when the human left me to go there, and took my usual position under the car across the street to monitor things and make sure the human doesn’t get too fond of Serafina while she’s there.

Then when the Creature came home from school, I discovered she’d been somewhere other than school – and it looked like she’d had FUN!

See fur yourself!

She had gone with some other creatures  to a place called  a ‘mill’- and “the teacher” must have not liked everyone’s hair, because she made them all cover it up! 


And appurrently they didn’t like what was on the menu, because everybody found a big rock and smashed it all into itty bitty pieces. Must’ve been purrty awful stuff.

But the “teacher” must have not liked that either, because she made them all pick it up and put the powdery stuff in a bag and take it home to their parents!🙀

 And the really weird thing is, when the Creature brought home the stuff she smashed into itty bitty pieces, her parents were purroud of her- and, even though the stuff must’ve been awful, they’re going to USE IT! 

🙀 And they call us animals!

Creature Feature: Double Trouble 

Published April 22, 2016 by hairballexpress

Greetings humans!😺 ☕️   

Well, I think there’s something wrong with my eyes – lately when I follow my human over to the Creature’s house, I start seeing double!  Yep – that’s right. 

I hide under the bushes and watch (being careful that the Creature doesn’t see me and come after me)- and right when I think I’ve got everything all figured out, up pops ANOTHER Creature! 🙀


Yesterday, I watched as the human called the Creature inside and they started coloring together – and suddenly the Creature next door came bursting inside to show off her claw polish! (Those claws are scary enough without that shiny pink stuff on them)!

The next thing I knew they were at the table together plotting and drawing out their blueprint of the Kat attack they had scheduled – and then, I couldn’t believe my eyes – 


They captured poor little Serafina!🙀

She narrowly escaped – thanks to the human looking up from the computer just in time to see them purrparing to dress her in doll clothes!

Luckily, the Creature next door got called inside by her mom (Serafina purrayed)- and the human was able to distract the Creature long enough fur poor Serafina to run away and hide. 

She was so relieved that she managed to escape, so we’re getting together today with a few blueprints of our own – the next time those two creatures get together, we’ll have a surprise of our own fur them! 


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