Kat 9 News Special Report

Well furiends, it appears the humans have FINALLY figured out just how pathetic we think they are.

In a recent scientific study by PURRnell University, researchers found (among other things), that we KATS not only know what humans are saying, but we also know what they’re thinking!

One very FURustrated kat, Oliver, put it this way after he discovered his human once again bought “bargain” kat food;

We get it, Oliver.

And another very important kat, Piddles, had his fill of the humans too.

He told researchers he was fed up with his humans’ warped ideas of playing with him and was about to take matters into his own claws!

In fact, researchers also found Mr. Snookums had had all he could handle and had resorted to desPURRate measures…

They’ve determined also that almost all of us KATS also blame our humans fur all our troubles…

Yes, they even learned that we don’t approve of our humans’ housekeeping habits….

Or their taste in interior design….

Or, their habits of throwing away valuables.

And most enlightening of all (to those idiot humans), they’ve FINALLY figured out (after only a few thousand years)- just how much we KATS actually value them-

This has been Shrimp reporting fur Kat 9 news. Good day.