“I wanna be a barn… Because then I’ll have a HORSE!”

Published August 20, 2014 by hairballexpress

It all started with this:



Today the human went to the Creature’s cave to watch it while its parents are at work.

The human was sipping some coffee while the Creature was eating her breakfast, and suddenly the Creature got up and said, “Hey, when you get more coffee use THIS cup!”

The human told it, “Well, no I won’t use that cup because it’s a very special cup” – she explained to it, that it’s a Disney character on the cup, and that it was not only a cup the Creatures’ mom just bought, but it was also expensive and hard to replace because it’s a collector’s mug – the Creature said, “No, it’s a CUP!”

Then the human answered, “Yes, a collector’s cup” – and she explained that the Creature’s mom would be very upset if she used it and somehow it got broken…..

“Well, she would be mad at YOU, not me, because I didn’t do it, YOU DID!”


*(snickers)* / *(scratch)*

The human (tried) to get her to understand that it was a matter of respecting her daughters’ wishes. The Creature was apparently baffled by the concept-

Her reply was, “Oh, COME ON! You’re her MOM! She doesn’t get to tell you what to do!” ๐Ÿ˜ธ

That led to a long (pointless) discussion about children eventually growing up and becoming adults and no longer being under their parent’s authority –

“Oh, COME ON! How can a daughter be a daughter and a grown up at the same time?”


The human tried to explain that when creatures get to be old enough to have a spouse and creatures of their own, things change- “like a teenager?”
Then, …..”I wanna be a TEENAGER! – No, wait- I wanna be A BARN!!”

*(human spews out coffee)*

“You want to be a BARN?
why would you want to be a BARN?”

“Because then I’d have a HORSE!”

(Human): “horses poop in barns – you don’t wanna be a BARN!”

(Creature): “Why do horses poop in barns?”

(Human): “Where else are they going to do it? They don’t have toilets…”

(Creature): “then I wanna be a Barner …”

(Human): “A Barner?”

(Creature): “Yeah, the one who takes care of the barn and the horses!”

(Human): “Oh, you mean a FARMER!”

(Creature): “No, a Barner!”

*(human gives up and brews a gallon of coffee)*


16 comments on ““I wanna be a barn… Because then I’ll have a HORSE!”

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