Well, I was minding my own business this morning, snoozing and dreaming of tunas and dragonflies, when the flippin human decided it was a purrfect time to bring out that obnoxious electronic BEAST and send my blood pressure through the roof!
I didn’t appreciate my nap being interrupted fur the next hour as she vacuumed and made enough racket to wake the dinosaurs, but what she did after that was even worse!
She picked me up, took my collar off, and GAVE ME A FLIPPIN BATH! Do I look like a dog??
I thought I made it clear to the moron that I didn’t want a bath, but she just sweet-talked me and kept right on dumping water over me!
I should have known it was coming- because she wiped my eyes and cleaned my ears and clipped my claws right before she did the vacuuming…
In spite of my crying and complaining she bathed me anyway…
Now I’m exhausted after all that crying and struggling… But dang,I DO look beautiful- and I feel better too – (but I’m not about to let the human know it! *(tail flap)*
hairballexpress 
gotta say I don’t blame you one bit for being upset! Doesn’t she know that cats don’t need baths unless they got into something nasty??????? xoox
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She says she’s gonna start doing that a few days before my flea treatment every month.. Why the heck is she gonna treat my flippin FLEAS!!? those flippin treats are FUR ME!! 😾
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Oh My Cats! As if the roaring monster isn’t bad enough, she even gave you a bath??? 😯 That’s just NOT FAIR!! Humans can be so mean sometimes!! (*angry tail flaps*) But at least you got some treats afterwards…
Uh oh, that reminds us… the human hasn’t wiped our eyes or cleaned our ears for a week now… 😯 So we’d better go into hiding as it won’t be long before she’ll come and get us… See ya! 😉
Purrs and tunas to ya! 🙂
xx Roxy & Tigerlino ❤
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🐾🐾🐾🐾Run!!!RUN FUR YOUR LIVES!!!
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😉
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Aaaaw Shrimp yous du look gawjus. Course yous always look gawjus. 🙂
Luv ya’
Dezi
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Why thank you beautiful! You just made furry little day!
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Yous welkum. Meez only tell da twuff. 🙂
Luv ya’
Dezi
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*(purrs)*
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There’s nothing more sorry-looking than a wet cat. 😦 We feel for you. Bo and Kobi
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So do I! *(pout)*
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Tell your human KATS do not need baths AND why on earth is she giving you yucks for fleas? DO you go outside? I mean really, what the flipping nerve of your human to do these things to you. Tell her, you are packing your kitty litter pan to come live with Mom BonZo who never gives her KATS a bath or yuck flea stuff either. MB does do nails, clean ears and brush teeth however. Your call, Shrimp. Front door is open for ya! LOVE, and BIG HUMUNGOUS HUGS, Mom BonZo
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And no creature either!?? *(thinking,….)+!
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Nope. No creature. Zero. None. Zip. You would have to share space with FOURTEEN other KATS. Can you handle that? I know SUPERKAT ROCKY would be smitten with you! Hmmm ….. oh and Doodes man, he’s the man. Gals fall over him!!!
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😸on my way!!!!
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Oops, before you leave. There is a slight catch. *sigh* Sorry. I furgot to tell you, COOKIE is the Queen. So you would no longer be a Queen. Now the up side to all this, you have plenty of BOYS to tease and flick your beautiful tail at. They’d be ALL pantin’ to be your beau. Still wanna come?
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Hmmmm…..(thinking)… I’ll toss a coin… (Can you do that with paws)?
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Hmmmm…….hard to say. How talented are you?
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I’ll have to try and find out! *(tail swish)*
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Ya never know until you try IF you can. GRIN!
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Hehehe!!!😺💗
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Let me know if you can flip something besides your tail. Hehehehehehe
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Hehehehe….
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Double oops. *sighs again* I have a male human who makes a LOT of noise and who can be as aggravatin’ as your creature can be. Sorry sorry sorry. I just wanna be as sure as sure as can be, you know what your gettin’ into. You wouldn’t miss your human one tiny little bit? Notta? Even though she gives you baths you don’t need? And tell her you must be extra good, cause IF I gave any of mine a bath, I would have permanent scars from nails diggin’ into flesh. Ewwwwww …… Shrimp, and this too. NEVER make a BIG decision when you are upset. So sleep on this OK?? You do know how to sleep? Oh I know you do!!!! Let me know in the mornin’ when things are all bright and sunny. My front door is still wide open fur ya anytime!
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Hmmm…..well she did just buy a bunch of fancy feast- it would be an outrage if it got wasted!! Ok- I’ll think about it!! *(purrs*)
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Never waste fancy feast. OMKATS!!! That would be an outrage!
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Oh don’t worry- I’ll take care of the fancy feast! 😍
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Yikes Shrimp..az one cranky tortie to another..ditch the human…what a outrage…sheesh…paw pats Marbles xxxx
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Yeah, those dudes are only good fur feeding us!…and back rubs…and neck scratches…and buying catnip..and treats… And making sure we get comfy chairs fur our thrones…and belly rubs… And keeping the CREATURES DISTRACTED!!! *(sigh)*
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There is a simple method to stop your human from bathing you. Find her most favorite item and put a note next to it. One more bath and this will be destroyed slowly and painfully! 😉
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MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! I flippin LOVE YOU, human!!! MOL!! (Now where’s that crayon I saw earlier)?
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Vacuum and bath the same day? I think you might want to call the SPCA. That might be considered abuse.
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Oh trust me. I have plans in place that will eliminate the possibility of her EVER making that mistake again…..(hehehe)- she’ll NEVER find her shiny new
iPHONE!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
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