I checked out this Kat Online Dating Website yesterday and immediately had some responses from some handsome kats.
Of course, I was all excited and arranged to meet them last night. So let me tell you how it went…
First there was my favorite, Frenchie – I fell in love at first sight with this handsome thing….
Gorgeous, huh? NOT!!!
HERE’S WHAT SHOWED UP AT THE DOOR...
The humans almost had a heart attack –
And I flew under the bed at speeds I didn’t know I was capable of!
It turns out that “Frenchie” is a flippin HORSE!! (He conned the kat next door to his farm into posing fur the picture, and the kat is a flippin FEMALE! ) * HISS!!! *
I tossed him out on his four flippin hooves and told him to get lost!
I was mad as a hornet… But, I still had a date with Max to look furward to, so I groomed
myself (repeatedly), drowned my sorrows in a bucket of catnip, and got all prettied up fur Max…. Deer, handsome Max…..
But THIS IS WHAT SHOWED UP……
Okay, this is not funny… I don’t know what the flea that is, but it’s NOT a kat!
He snagged a picture from his rich owners’ photo album of their Crazy Aunt Beluga’s animal menagerie. He had “always wanted to date a kat….”
Then there was handsome “Swanky”….
I LOVED those big, green eyes….. But once again…..Well…. Take a look………
“Swanky” turned out to be “Sissy”….. With anger issues!
What’s worse is she won’t say where she got the picture of “Swanky” so I can try to find him! Moron.
I was pretty upset after meeting the first three dates, but I thought surely, the fourth one will be worthwhile….
So I hurried off to meet Jake.
Bless my Fancy Feast! Jake is even more gorgeous in purrson than he is in his picture!!!!!!!
We fell fur each other right away……But we got over it as soon as his wife, his 5
(other) girlfriends, and his 400 kittens found us at the park.
*Sigh.* Its just as well. Between the pawimony and the kitten support, he wouldn’t be able to buy my Fancy Feast anyway. Poor Dude can’t even afford catnip.
That left me with “The Dark Knight….”
Now I know why he’s called the “Dark Knight” – ten minutes after meeting him I wanted to knock him out!
Then there was one more date to meet...
“Blackie!” Cute little Blackie with the black and white bow tie. *Sigh* ♥
♥ Blackie’s adorable….. And a little shy….♥
But he brought me a gift…..♥
Oh well… Nobody’s purrfect! ** Swoons**