More kat careers

You know, people underestimate the talents and intelligence of their local housekat.

Fur example, in the picture below it looks like I’m sleeping. But there’s much more happening there:

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I’m reminding the humans that they need to take a break often throughout their busy day.

I’m showing them how to let it all go and just chill.

I’m also testing their bedding fur comfort – you know, making sure there’s no lumps under the blankets.

In other words, I’m a sleep therapist!

But I’m not the only talented housekat -

Look at the careers some of my furiends have:

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• Sweater models (they get paid a boatload of tuna and treats to look that ridiculous)…

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• Door Decoration -

It doesn’t pay much, but hey, at least he can’t get arrested fur bring a peeping tom!

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• Sea Captain;

No pay, but the fringe benefits are PAWSOME!

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• Bed Warmers:

Few people know this, but this is also another one of my many talents – one of the best fringe benefits of this career is the frequent spider snacks we get when they sneak out while humans are sleeping- (YUM)!

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• Food taster -

Dude. Must’ve been the cheap stuff.

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• Image consultant -

I hear it’s very rewarding to bolster another kats’ self esteem (never tried it purrsonally)!

Well, time fur me to log in fur bed warming duty – stay tuned fur more fascinating kat careers!

Dang HUMAN!

Well, I was minding my own business this morning, snoozing and dreaming of tunas and dragonflies, when the flippin human decided it was a purrfect time to bring out that obnoxious electronic BEAST and send my blood pressure through the roof!

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I didn’t appreciate my nap being interrupted fur the next hour as she vacuumed and made enough racket to wake the dinosaurs, but what she did after that was even worse!

She picked me up, took my collar off, and GAVE ME A FLIPPIN BATH! Do I look like a dog??

I thought I made it clear to the moron that I didn’t want a bath, but she just sweet-talked me and kept right on dumping water over me!

I should have known it was coming- because she wiped my eyes and cleaned my ears and clipped my claws right before she did the vacuuming…

In spite of my crying and complaining she bathed me anyway…

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Now I’m exhausted after all that crying and struggling… But dang,I DO look beautiful- and I feel better too – (but I’m not about to let the human know it! *(tail flap)*

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The drowned Barbie and other horror stories

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Apparently Barbie isn’t much brighter than the moron humans that made her, since she’s laying there grinning from ear to ear even after the Creature drowned her in the bathroom sink fur an hour.

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And undaunted by the now REALLY  lifeless Barbie, the Creature moves on to drown the zebra too…(lucky him).Bad enough the poor plastic dude got slathered in girly soap first and suffered the indignities of girly clips on his mane- now he has to drown with a “soapin naked” Barbie on top of that. Oh joy.

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And now fur the next slathering of girly soap (just in case he’s not humiliated enough).

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And now the finishing touches- (finishing him off)!

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And now  she gives poor drowned Barbie some animal cookies… (Really)?

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Uh oh. More in store for poor Barbie and the zebra…(look at the poor dude’s face)!

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She’s so purroud of herself…

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And now she’s  cold!?

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I guess she doesn’t want the zebra to miss out…(poor dude)….

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 And they wonder why I dive under the bed when it comes around….(go figure)! *(tail flap)*

Mirrors: the Cool kat’s toy

I’m amazed at how many kats out there still insist on playing with stuffed mice and other kat toys even after all my well – planned lectures. Oh good litter!

But I’m going to let you know what the really cool, smart kats (like me) play with:

Mirrors!

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Now this kat may look like he’s just staring at himself in the mirror, but he’s actually inspecting the frame fur damages. He’s such a hard worker!

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Now, you’d purrobably never guess it but this kat is a motivational speaker!

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And this kat, well, he’s one of those egotistical kats that think he’s better than all the others…

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And this kat, well, he’d make Grumpy kat purroud! The mirror looked at him the wrong way- and he’s a living example of the proper cattitide that every kat needs to strive fur. Good job, Rambo kitty!

More tomorrow- time fur my 12th nap and I’m already late! *(yawn)*

More kitten lessons; the joy of windows

As I’ve been saying in the last two posts, young kittens need to be careful to avoid the kat toy trap their humans set fur them.

There’s just too many other fun things fur kats to play with instead of toy mice (really people? Do we look stupid)?

Take fur example this delightful idea;

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Now there’s a kat that’s full of creative ideas! He’s not only having fun, but at the same time he’s helping his human redecorate, sweeping the floor, and setting a new fashion trend!

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And here’s another kat doing her part to add a little color and pizazz to her castle…

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And this kitty is helping its human redecorate the bathroom. Hope they don’t mind him sitting in their water dish.

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Now this smart kat knows long dangly things are a hazard to little creatures, so he’s purrtecting the creatures at his castle by chewing off those long, tempting pull cords!

So whatever you do, kittens, find your own creative playthings. And if all else fails, there’s always the cell phones. Calling 911 and watching the humans try to figure out who did it is a real hoot! Hehehe!

*(purrs)*